


Falling

by Badassium1970



Series: Chemicals [2]
Category: Overwatch (Video Game)
Genre: Backstory, Establishing universe, F/M, Falling In Love, Slow Burn, fear of needles
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-22
Updated: 2017-11-22
Packaged: 2019-02-05 12:38:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,741
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12794733
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Badassium1970/pseuds/Badassium1970
Summary: You and Jamie get to know each other a little better.Establishing the universe as you start to fall for Jamison.





	Falling

I’d been leaving my office a lot more nowadays, usually with Jamie, and sometimes Mako. It was weird how the pair were seemingly joined at the hip, yet spent quite a bit of time apart. I could swear that Mako had some kind of radar that told him Junkrat was doing something stupid.

Another thing I noticed was that Jamie and Junkrat were like two different people. Jamie was kind, patient and clumsy. Junkrat was dangerous, demanding and we uncaring, but in the way that he didn’t care if he or the people on his team got hurt, unless it was Mako. It was weird to see the transformation, and there didn’t seem to be any indication as to when it was going to happen, but there were times where he had to be confined to a room where he could just for lack of a better term explode.

Jamie didn’t really like to talk about the times he turns into Junkrat, and I wasn’t going to pry, knowing first-hand what it’s like to lose control and not even be aware of what’s happening. Although, where Jamie and I differed was that he remembered what he did, and he didn’t regret it, knowing that he wasn’t harming innocent people, at least not on purpose, and that he would never hurt his friends. Jamie and Junkrat could co-exist in a way that Jamie could somewhat control, because Junkrat was who he needed to be sometimes, and really Junkrat was just an extreme version of him that sometimes, actually almost always, spiralled a little out of control.

Angela had been trying to find a way to help him, but Jamie, and Junkrat, both disagreed to it, not wanting help. He liked how he was, and knew that Mako would always be able to keep him in check.

“’nd I know you can too Sheila,” Jamie told me once after a particularly bad time as Junkrat that lasted for two weeks. He hadn’t harmed anyone, luckily, Lena was a little shaken up because a bomb had been thrown in her direction, but she didn’t hold anything against Jamie. She also knew what it was like to not be fully in control of your body and how scary it was. Lucio had gotten a little protective of Hana since Junkrat had threatened her, but Hana herself just laughed it off. I swear that girl didn’t understand what danger was.

It felt nice that Jamie trusted me, but at the same time it was a lot of pressure and I knew that I wasn’t going to always be able to there for him. Sometimes my blackouts would last longer than usual, sometimes spanning a month. It was part of the reason why I knew I would never be an actual soldier, no matter how hard anyone tried to convince me that I was a soldier, and that I was important, I knew it wasn’t true. I was a scientist, and Overwatch had a few of them, I had never achieved what Angela or Winston have and I doubted I ever will. Honestly, I doubted that I could even be called a hero, now when I was here because I was scared of the possibility of being kidnapped and experimented on again.

I did promise to help Jamie when I could, and in turn, he promised to help me, even though I told him not to, and that it was too great a risk.

“I don’t know what I’m doing when I’m in that state, I could hurt you, I could kill you.” The thought of hurting or possibly murdering Jamie made me shake with fear.

“’Ave you ever killed anyone?” Jamie asked, genuinely curious.

I shook my head.

“I don’t think so.” There was no way to be sure. Since coming to Overwatch I know I hadn’t, but when in the facility there’s a chance that I had. The people experimenting on me never told me anything, and if I asked they would never answer, sometimes they would even beat me, but that would often send me into a blackout and I don’t know what I did then but I hoped I got the chance to hurt them before they restrained me.

“Probably won’t off me then. ‘T’s not in your heart to kill.”

I wasn’t sure if that was reassuring or not. That meant that killing was in Jamie’s heart, but that made sense. I’d never been to the outback, but I knew about the conditions, it was hard not to. I had longed to go to Australia and help get rid of the chemicals and help the people’s poor health, but I hadn’t been assigned to that sector and we were still a long way away from actually being able to help. What the chemicals were and how they affected people was still unknown as no amount of testing gave us a clear answer and everyone seemed to react differently.

Other than the current conditions in Australia and how it had become a dog eat dog world, the fact that Jamie had agreed to come to Overwatch also showed that he would kill. I wasn’t sure if I could make myself kill someone, even if they were someone who had experimented on me. The fact that they probably had a family and a life outside of this made me reluctant. Soldier 76 always got angry at me if I ever said I didn’t think I could kill. I still hated that man, even if he had started to soften up a bit recently, he was still a dick.

So, Jamie and Junkrat both had killing in their heart, and I was okay with that. Call me stupid, or naive but I knew he wouldn’t hurt me, or anyone on the team. Sure he had gotten close but it had never actually happened. He cared about us, well the majority of us, and he understood that everyone on the team was important, even if they could be jerks to him.

Now that I was outside my office more I saw a lot more of the agents, but I spent most of my time with Jamie. It was clear that some people were wary of Jamison and myself, but in different ways. Mei was clearly afraid of Junkrat, but she was still kind to him, keeping her distance but if he walked passed she would smile, and if they ended up in a room together she would sometimes make small talk. Others weren’t so kind, Hanzo blatantly ignored me and he would scowl at Jamie whenever he accidentally dropped something or spoke louder than what was probably necessary, but after a while I picked up that this was normal and that Hanzo had a very messed up past and was also struggling to fit in, especially since he wasn’t technically in Overwatch, but he found himself unable to leave, either because of missions cropping up or something inside of him telling him to stay. Soldier 76 was still hesitant about me, and he was downright rude to Jamie, maybe it was just his military background or his age but 76 was such a stickler for rules and regulations and Jamie... well Jamie wasn’t. He knew not to test out his explosives near anyone or anyone’s personal belongings. Everywhere else was fair game in his book. While I agreed that maybe it wasn’t the best policy no one had told Jamie otherwise… Okay it was a weak argument, but I didn’t want to agree with Soldier 76 on something, especially when he was so mean to Jamie.

It did surprise me that the majority of the agents were quite welcoming and I was invited to hang out with them often, though they never pushed me to say yes, knowing that I had already taken a big step coming out of my lab. Every now and again I caught someone looking at me and Jamie before whispering to their friend. It didn’t bother me too much, let them think what they want. Maybe part of me not minding was to do with the fact that I was finding myself fall for Jamie.

I knew it was unprofessional. Angela had now assigned him to me to look after and do any testing if he needs it. So, Jamie was technically my patient if he ever needed a doctor, but I knew of other recruits that were in relationships, Lucio and Hana for example, and Jesse was trying way too hard to get Hanzo’s attention. I’d asked him about it, in a brief moment of confidence, and although he had denied it, the way he was blushing and stammering made it obvious. I know that Angela used to have a crush on Genji back in his Blackwatch days. She told me that she knew it was unprofessional, but she couldn’t help it. She never acted on her feelings, knowing that Genji was not in the right frame of mind to be in a relationship.

“Would you have, if things were different?” I had asked.

“I do not know. I value the friendship that Genji and I have now, and if I had acted we might not have that. But I was a little selfish in my youth, so maybe.” She frowned, clearly thinking about her actions in the past, but I couldn’t imagine Angela being selfish. She was always putting others first. Jesse had told me how she always took time out of her day to check on him and Genji, especially after Moria joined Blackwatch. I hadn’t heard much about Moria, but what I had heard made me feel sick. It was weird, but her name sounded familiar. I’d probably just overheard it in passing at some point, but it made me wonder if she was the one who experimented on me, but I knew that wasn’t possible. The people who kidnapped me weren’t Talon, surprisingly.

I told Angela that I doubted she could have been selfish and she laughed, a sadness in her tone.

“We all are sometimes. I couldn’t let people go, and that has caused them a lot of suffering.”

Angela had told me about Genji and how he had been angry when he was brought back, and how he thought he was just a killing machine. That wasn’t true, Reyes viewed him as more than that, a lot of people did. From what I had heard, it was people in Overwatch who had made him think that way. Speaking of Reyes, I knew that he was Reaper. I wasn’t supposed to know, but Soldier 76 had left some files open and I saw Gabriel’s name. I asked Angela, swearing her to secrecy about my knowledge on the subject. She told me she didn’t know what happened. It wasn’t like she hadn’t revived people before. She suspected that Moira had experimented on him and that was why things went wrong.

“Angela, what happened to Commander Reyes wasn’t your fault. He was your friend, of course you wanted to help him. It wasn’t selfish.”

She smiled at that, thanking me, but I knew she didn’t believe me.

When I thought back on what she said that day, I did wonder if my feelings for Jamie were wrong, and if it would be selfish to tell him how I felt. I doubted I would find the courage anyway, but if I did, well it wouldn’t be right would it? Jamie had issues, that was clear, and we weren’t even sure what exactly was wrong with him. That’s why Angela wanted to do tests on him, but he wouldn’t let her and he wouldn’t let me either. If I ever tried to bring it up he would immediately shut me down, not in a nasty way, but he would change the conversation.

I think Mako was the one to finally convince him to get it done. Mako had already been through the tests. It was surprising to find out that he didn’t have a lot wrong with him. His body had been a little deformed, but that didn’t seem to be an issue. He did have something wrong with his lungs but it was mild and Angela was able to help him.

Jamie came to me late into the evening. I was just started to pack my things away when he knocked on my door. I let him in and can tell that he’s nervous.

“Jamie, are you okay?” I question, unsure what could be wrong. He had seemed so happy when I last saw him, laughing with Hana about something that happened involving Lucio getting scared.

“I uh, I wanted to talk ‘bout them tests.” Jamie scratched at his collarbone, which from what I had learnt from spending time with him was one of his nervous ticks. I knew that the chances of him actually going through with these tests was slim and that I had to be careful with my words, knowing we were standing on thin ice.

“What about them Jamie?” I smiled, trying to calm him. He smiled back, still looking a little scared but it was something.

“Been thinkin’ I should ‘ave them. Always said I trusted ya, so there ain’t a reason I shouldn’t, right?” From Jamie’s tone, it seemed like he was asking for a way out. He wanted me to give him a reason not to.

“It would be best for you. Mako had his tests and although his conditions weren’t terrible, they could have gotten worse if he hadn’t received care. I wouldn’t want that to happen to you Jamie.”

The thought of losing Jamie hurt. I’d thought it before when he’s been on missions. I would worry that he wasn’t going to come back, but he always did.

Jamie rung his hands together and sighed.

“Right, I guess I better then,” he laughed nervously. I’d never seen Jamie so unsure about something. I wasn’t sure I’d ever seen him scared, I thought he was just stubborn.

“Jamie, why don’t you want to take these tests?”

I expected Jamie to refuse to answer the question and leave. That’s what he did with Angela, but to my surprise he sat down on one of the chairs in my office, beckoning me over to him. He took one of my hands in his, and I can’t deny that I started to blush.

“Promise ya won’t tell anyone.” Jamie’s voice was quiet, and he was looking up at me, eyes wide.

“Of course I won’t tell anyone Jamie.” I knew it might have been wrong to promise him that. If he had done something bad, or if there was something wrong with him that I couldn’t help with then I would have to tell someone.

“I… I don’t like needles.”

Of all things I hadn’t expected that. Jamie always seemed so fearless. He worked with bombs! I’d seen him almost blow himself up at least three times this week. The fact that needles of all things were what freaked him out, well it was kind of cute actually.

“Oh, well I wish I could tell you I won’t have to use them but I will need to take a blood sample. Sorry.” I felt bad knowing that I was going to have to put Jamie into an uncomfortable situation.

“If ya have to do it, ya have to. I trust ya, remember.” Jamie gave me a wonky smile.

“Okay, the test has to be done on an empty stomach so meet me before breakfast. If your good I’ll see if I can get permission from Winston to take you out for something special.”

That made Jamie give me a real smile. I knew that he would want to go out to get pancakes or waffles, maybe a place that has good Boba tea. Not that I would complain about any of those options and it wouldn’t be too difficult considering there were some dinners nearby.

“Alright Sheila, see ya tomorrow.” Jamie let go of my hand, I’d forgotten he was holding it, it had begun to feel so natural.

“Goodnight Jamie.”

“G’night,” Jamie said, giving me a lazy wave as he yawned, his nose scrunching as he did so, which was just so adorable. I waved back, feeling my heart racing. I knew I was in too deep with this, but I could remain professional. He probably only saw me as a friend.


End file.
